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1. Don’t spoil or pamper me, I know quite well that I won’t get all I ask for. I am only testing you. |
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2. Don’t be afraid to be firm with me. I usually prefer it; it makes me feel more secure. |
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3. Don’t let form bad habits. I have to rely on you to detect them in early stages. Treat me sensitively but firmly. |
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4. Don’t make me feel smaller than I am. It only makes me behave stupidly ‘big’. |
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5. Don’t correct me in front of people if you can help it. I’ll take more notice if you talk quietly with me in private. |
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6. Don’t make me feel that me mistakes are terrible. I have to learn to make mistakes without feeling bad. |
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7. Don’t be too upset when I say ‘I hate you’. It isn’t you I hate but your power to thwart me. I don’t mean it and it’s just a way of trying to make you feel sorry for what you’ve done to me. |
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8. Don’t always protect me from consequences. I need to learn the painful way sometimes. |
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9. Don’t nag. If you do I shall have to protect myself be appearing deaf. |
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10. Don’t make rash promises. Remember that I feel badly let down when promises are broken. That will discourage my trust in you. |
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11. Don’t forget that I cannot explain myself as well as I should like. That is why I am not always very accurate. |
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12. Don’t tax my honesty too much. I am easily frightened into telling lies. |
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13. Don’t be inconsistent. That confuses me and makes me lose faith in you. |
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14. Don’t put me off when I ask questions. If you do you will find that I stop asking and seek information elsewhere. |
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15. Don’t do things for me that I can do myself. It makes me feel like a baby, and I will therefore act helpless like one, and put you in my service. |
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16. Don’t try to discuss my behaviour in the heat of the conflict. For some reason my hearing is not very good at this time, and my cooperation is even worse. It’s all right to take the action required, but let’s not talk about it until later. |
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17. Don’t preach to me. You’d be surprised how well I know what’s right and wrong. |
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18. Don’t demand explanations for my wrong behaviour. I really don’t know why I did it. |
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19. Don’t use force with me. It teaches me that power is all that counts. I will respond more readily to being led. |
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20. Don’t fall for provocations when I say and do things just to upset you. If you do, I’ll try for more such ‘victories’. |
